I've read a book. Drunk a bit of coffee. Relaxed outside in the sun and relaxed inside when it has been raining.
I've also done a bit of eating and that has resulted in our supplies running low.
Consequently, that's meant a trip to the supermarket and that's where we came across three characters who I absolutely must tell you about.
The first two I will get to shortly but I want you to first picture Mrs P sitting beside me gnawing away on her favourite snack - mini cucumbers - as we pull up in the supermarket carpark.
And as we do, we encounter two blokes having a ding-dong row.
Now I don't know exactly what it was about but in the short space of time from us arriving, turning off the engine and me unclipping my seat belt to get out, this brouhaha went from raised voices to punches.
Alert to the dangers of somebody getting seriously hurt, Mrs P immediately requested I call the police. Then she started on another mini cucumber.
Obviously, it was a question of priorities.
Anyway, I figured by the time I found my phone, unlocked it, rang the number and then went through all the rigmarole I knew would be associated with reporting the shenanigans, it was highly likely one or both of the combatants would have realised they looked stupid and gone home for a cup of calming chamomile tea.
So instead of making the call, I got out of the cart and yelled at them in my best authoritarian voice to pack it in.
By that stage, the larger, tubbier of the two had weathered the initial onslaught from the smaller bloke - I'll call him Corgi, I'm sure you'll know his type - and was now in control.
As I watched, Corgi tried to kick Tubby who, in turn, caught Corgi's leg and was now making him hop about as they circled.
Corgi couldn't do much but try to wriggle free but he couldn't stop a couple of nasty jabs going into his ribs from Tubby, which I thought a bit unkind and unnecessary.
At this point, I had decided to take a deep breath and intervene - though I'm not really sure what I could have done other than push them both over and tell them not to be such silly sods - but thankfully, I was saved by the arrival of a woman, who I presumed was the better half of the Corgi.
Exactly what was said was lost on my eardrums but there was a lot of screaming, the stuff which you' d normally expect from an intoxicated teenage girl on a Saturday night, and the warring duo parted and went their separate ways.
Back in the car, like a drive-in movie-goer hooked on a good thriller, Mrs P was still chomping away on her cucumbers.
Anyway, drama over, we went inside and set about our shopping, happy at least I would have something to write about this week other than the number of sheep in the paddock next to us or how many litres of instant coffee it's possible to consume in an afternoon.
A while later, we approached the self checkouts where, again, we heard raised voices.
This time, there was an elderly bloke absolutely letting rip. The only thing was, he was the only one standing there. There was nobody else within five yards.
"So who was he arguing with?" I hear you ask.
Mrs P and I were thinking the same until we heard a robotic voice from the machine asking him to wait for assistance.
"I don't want bloody assistance!" he roared. "I just want to pay."
Again, the robot asked him to wait. This time, obviously at boiling point, he yelled at it to "Shut up!"
Fortunately, a nice lady came over and sorted things for him but we could see as he packed his groceries he was struggling to hold it all together.
Sadly, I have to tell you he failed.
As he picked up his now loaded bag, he realised he'd left one item in his trolley. A cucumber.
Suddenly all the frustration he had been feeling beforehand came rushing back and he picked the offending vegetable up and hurled it with all his might back into the fruit and vegetable section.
But wait, there's more. Guess who it hit? Tubby, the unkind carpark brawler from earlier.
Karma, or maybe that should be cucumber, was never more deserved.