Dear Annie: Teen feels stuck between parents


Dear Annie: Teen feels stuck between parents

Dear Annie: My parents have been in a rocky marriage for as long as I can remember. I'm 16, and my brother is 20 and away at college. My dad has left and come back a few times, and now he's telling my mom again that he's done and wants her to move out. She's heartbroken, and it's really hard to watch. I've seen her cry more in the past few weeks than in my whole life.

I don't really know how to talk to my dad about it. He says he still loves us but doesn't want to be with Mom anymore. I feel stuck in the middle. How am I supposed to handle this without picking sides or breaking down myself? -- Torn Teen

Dear Torn Teen: It's hard to watch people you love hurt each other -- and I'm sure it's even more difficult for you now that your brother is out of the house. There's no road map to marriage -- or divorce -- so you need to make sure you're protecting your peace while your parents figure out theirs.

The best thing you can do right now is be honest about how this is affecting you. Talk to your dad and let him know that while you understand he may not want to be with your mom anymore, you still need him to show up for you. Support your mom with love, not by taking on her pain as your own.

If possible, find someone to talk to -- a counselor, a teacher or another trusted adult.

View prior 'Dear Annie' columns

"How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane's second anthology -- featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation -- is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].

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